Asking a former colleague for an intro

Former colleagues are the warm intro path most sellers forget they have. You spent years in the trenches with these people. Many of them now sit at companies you want to reach, or know someone who does.

But the relationship has cooled. You haven't talked in ages. Asking for a favor out of nowhere feels awkward, and it can be, if you do it wrong.

Here's how to do it right.

Why former colleagues are worth it

A former colleague knows your work. Not your firm's marketing. Your actual work, how you handled a crisis, whether you kept your word. That's the kind of trust a buyer can't get from a website.

And people move. After a few years in any industry, your old coworkers are spread across dozens of companies. Some are now senior buyers. Others work next to them. When you map who you know at a target account, former colleagues often show up more than you'd expect.

The intro from them carries real weight. "I worked with this person for four years and they're the real deal" opens doors that cold outreach never will.

Reconnect before you ask

If you haven't talked in years, don't open with the ask. That feels transactional, and it is.

Reach out first with something genuine. Congratulate them on a new role. React to something they posted with a real comment. Share an article that made you think of a project you worked on together. Keep it short and expect nothing back.

Then wait. A week or two later, if they replied warmly, you can make the ask. If they didn't reply at all, think twice about asking.

This isn't a trick. It's how people actually rebuild a connection. You'd want the same courtesy if someone from your past reached out.

How to make the ask

Be direct and specific. Name the person you want to meet. Say why now. And make it easy to say no.

Something like this, sent as a private message or a short email. "Good to reconnect. I noticed you and the new head of operations at a logistics company we're watching worked together years back. They just took the role, and we've helped companies through the kind of system work they're likely inheriting. Would you be open to forwarding a short note? Totally fine if it doesn't feel right."

That's honest about what you want. It gives them context. And it gives them a graceful exit.

Write the note for them

Never make your former colleague write the intro. Draft it yourself, written to the target buyer, short enough to forward with one line on top.

Congrats on the new role. I lead a services team that works with mid-size distributors on warehouse and transport systems. Coming into operations at a company that just added two new facilities, my guess is the systems connecting them are the first headache on your desk. If that's right, I'd welcome a short call. If it's something else entirely, I'd still be glad to hear what's at the top of the list.

Your former colleague adds a line like "Worked with this person for years, worth a call" and forwards it. Done in a minute.

What to avoid

Don't ask a former colleague you parted with on bad terms. It's not worth it, and the intro won't help.

Don't ask for multiple intros at once. One person, one ask. If it goes well, the next ask is easier.

Don't oversell your connection to the target. If your former colleague barely knows them, the intro won't carry much weight. Ask how well they know the person first.

And don't go silent after. Tell them what happened. Thank them either way. A former colleague who sees you handle an intro with care will make the next one without being asked.

Keep the relationship warm

The best time to reconnect with old colleagues is before you need them. Send a note when someone changes jobs. Comment on their wins. Make intros for them when you can.

Do that consistently and the ask never feels cold. It's just one more thing you do for each other. That's how a network turns into a pipeline over time.